Grinds My Gears: Ergonomic Keyboards

You know what Grinds My Gears, ergonomic keyboards. Who told Microsoft it was okay to mess with the way I type? Sure the little slope at the bottom of the board is better on the wrists, and the thicker keys cut down on the click-clack noise, but the spacing of the keys is out of control!
The keyboard is on a slight curve making some buttons smaller than usual and some longer. This causes a dilemma. I have small hands, and the travel distance to the Caps Lock, Enter, and the letter "L" buttons is just off. I type "a" in an attempt to capitalize things, the quote button when trying to push Enter, and  "lol" ends up "kik". Sigh, really?! Sure, I might have gotten a slight case of carpal tunnel with my old keyboard, but we had a bond. This new one, not so much.